I love make up. I love having a nosey around make up counters (looking at you in particular Urban Decay) and getting myself into a flurry of excitement over the bright sparkly colours. Bright green lipstick? Sure, why not? I mean it looked great on The Hulk. Liquid eyeliner so waterproof that it requires four make up wipes and the ability to scrub for 17 minutes straight to remove? Yeah, go on then.
But what I don’t love is being told by my employer during an ambush intervention meeting that I basically looked like shit without make up. Oh, and that I was also to wear a minimum of concealer, eyeliner and mascara every day to work.
Apparently, my strange behaviour (not wearing make up to work for three days) had caused quite the feeling of mild hysteria in my boss. She politely enquired if I was enjoying my job, if I was happy in the workplace, if everything was okay in my personal life and even if my favourite type of green tea was available in the staff kitchen. In other words she buttered me up nicely before ramming a shit sandwich through my non-lipstick coated lips.
She simply said very matter of fact the following: ‘You need to wear make up everyday to work because I don’t think you look presentable or professional without it.’ This was by no means a joke; it was indeed a genuine request regarding the state of my face. Not my work, or my ability to do the job that I’ve been hired to do but instead I was reprimanded for my decision to not wear make up every single day.
I’m the first to admit – I’m pretty lazy. And I don’t mean your average ‘I’ll have an extra 5 minutes in bed snooze’, I mean super lazy, as in: I can sleep for 15 hours straight without feeling guilty. Obvs if I had to choose between an extra ten minutes in bed or painfully jamming contacts in my tired little peepers and then move on to the regime of concealer, eyeliner, mascara AND foundation every single day well I know which one I would choose.
You may be wondering exactly what exciting and glamorous job I have that requires me to wear make up every day – is she a make up artist? Is she an air steward? Is she a model? Erm no…I actually work in marketing (after my original plan of becoming Lena Dunham’s bezzie mate failed) for a national beauty brand. By beauty I don’t mean make up, by the way, I mean hair removal but we say beauty to make it sound a bit more fluffy.
So anyways, I was fucking outraged and what I really wanted to do what shout the following: ‘So hold up…I’m expected to work over 40 hours a week, plan numerous events and deliver many a campaign, handle work out of hours, and paint my face – every single fucking day?’ But of course this is real life – not a movie, and I’m not rich enough to get fired, so in defeat I nodded politely and shuffled back to my desk whilst resisting the temptation to shed a few tears.
This ambush meeting has effectively taken away my choice to control my appearance, and also raised a few angry voices in my head. Why are women constantly expected to wear make up? Why in 20-fucking-14 do the highest ticks of approval for women still centre on our physical appearance and beauty? Why is it acceptable for my employer to judge my presence in the workplace by my appearance as opposed to my skillset? Why do men not get told to whack on a bit of concealer and lippy? And since when is not wearing make up deemed unprofessional?
The beauty industry does a fan-fucking-tastic job of creating imperfections that we didn’t even know existed in ourselves and convincing us that they hold the key to making it all better. Obviously, the whole “making it all better” goal simply means to get us all looking a certain way to fit in with tightly controlled and unattainable ideals of beauty. It would be really useful if they honestly told us ‘Soz ladies, unless you can Photoshop your physical appearance with a magic wand every single living moment you probably won’t look like the model on the make up poster”, but that’s not in their financial interests, so they keep on pushing the dream.
I used to constantly obsess over my appearance thanks to magazines, the media generally, and looking at filtered snaps of everyone else around me who appeared super gorgeous on social media, but then one day I just stopped caring. Instead I focused my efforts into other things like baking, writing and stalking Idris Elba online. And you know what? When I realised that it’s really not that important for me to have a full face of make up and perfect hair every day I felt much happier.
By being cool with how I looked and my body I got back my confidence and regained some of the self-esteem that went temporarily missing during my teenage years. But sadly it seems that for women the beauty industry, media and society (my employer also) kind of want to take this away from us. Instead they want us buy into the idea that confidence and self-esteem is achieved only through buying into The Beauty Myth (love you forever Naomi Woolf) rather than our beautiful natural selves.
So it looks like I won’t be skipping into the office singing ‘I woke up like dis’ in my best Beyoncé voice, but instead I think I’ll be handing my notice in very soon and finding an employer that values my skills, as opposed to my ability to perfect winged eyeliner at 7am in the morning.
They can’t fire you!!
I’m sure some HR types will read this and be able to offer guidance.
In the meantime, if you are in a Union, contact them, if not, call ACAS.
http://www.acas.org.uk/index.aspx?articleid=1461
Unless you’re contractually obliged, I don’t see why you should HAVE to wear make-up.
I choose to somedays, but mostly, I can’t be bothered myself. My CHOICE.
(((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
A boy in my sixth form on a day I didn’t have time for the usual morning mascara, asked ‘what’s wrong with your face?’ and since then i’ve risked life and limb (missing the bus) to apply that mascara
BUT NO MORE
THANK YOU TARAN
Good for you Laura! xo
Haha- I have the opposite, I so rarely wear makeup that people are confused if I do and ask things like “have you been away?” and “you look so well rested!” hah! Its my face and I’ll do what I like with it.
Taran,
I am so sorry that you have been treated this way in what sounds like a toxic working environment, and while of course you did not want to lose your job, at least you now can now find an employer that will value your ability over your appearance.
Having worked in retail and then as a receptionist, I felt pressure to wear makeup every day and not only is it a hassle, it’s expensive too! I now work in an office in the countryside that does not require me to deal with the public, and the unwritten dress code is “whatever keeps you warm/comfortable” …I am quite lucky. I now only wear makeup if I am going out for the evening and thus I rarely have to buy it.
One quote in the article really resonated with me: “if I had to choose between an extra ten minutes in bed or painfully jamming contacts in my tired little peepers and then move on to the regime of concealer, eyeliner, mascara AND foundation every single day well I know which one I would choose.”
Well said and thank you for your article. All the best for the future!
Thank you Claire, it’s such a shame that things like this are still issues in the workplace.
And you’re certainly correct about the toxic workplace environment! Your job environment sounds wonderful! xo
HR type here who is happy to give some advice. Comment back if you want to chat!
Contact ACAS and take your company to the cleaners.
Your union can assist you. Not in a union? Join online right now. Not ACAS, not HR, a trade union, there to protect you in your workplace.
This is awful, but sadly I’m not surprised. Just the other day in the pub with a group of women, several of them stated they would expect women to wear makeup and one said she’d send an employee home if they didn’t. I was once told to “make sure I wore a skirt and some makeup” for a particular meeting. I didn’t. We still won the pitch. I love make up. I can’t resist a bit of glitter, but I’m damned if I’m going to wear it because someone wants, or expects me to. They can fuck right off.
Sadly, as one female scientist friend of mine says, you just have to tow the line sometimes, otherwise you lose your job.
It is so wrong. Sending support. I don’t know you, but I’m pretty sure your face is pretty fucking amazing without all that crap piled on.
Thanks Jen! xo
Hi everyone! Thanks for the amazing support.
My issues around make-up weren’t mentioned, but it probably did contribute to the overall situation of things.
xxxxx
If you’re not in a union, join the appropriate one straight away, then get their help. Union membership is so important, especially for women. Unions exist to protect workers and their rights – every employee should be joining.
Thanks for the advice Kirsten xo
First off as a business owner I can tell you this is the dumbest article I have ever seen. It doesn’t matter if you female or male you come to work presentable. If one of my employees comes to work for a couple days not shaved I tell him come back when your ready to work. You are representing a business and must look the part they are presenting themselves to potential customers whether out in public or in an office setting. Just remember your being paided to do your job this is not charity and if you don’t like it go work for someone else it’s free market nobody is confining you to that job.
Hahahaha. Ha. Oh boy. Ok, this might come as a bit of a shock to you, but not all women wear makeup all the time. In fact, you probably don’t even notice when you see a woman without makeup unless you’ve previously seen her made up. Makeup is not a hygiene or tidiness thing, it’s a fashion choice. In fact, most schools and workplaces have rules about either not wearing it at all or keeping it subtle. You don’t have a clue what you’re talking about.
Thanks Ember
wonderful comment xo
Oh dear, poor Ken, You’re illiterate and you think you can call someone for having a clean face. I know that’s not a like for like comparison, but I know who I’d employ.
“You can just go and work somewhere else if you don’t like it,” becomes a really nasty lie when too many employers say it. Or, y’know, in times of recession and high unemployment.
Good thing you’re (sic) not getting “paided” to write, edit or proofread anything, isn’t it? But sure, “man who can’t write English” is way less important than “woman chooses not to wear make-up.”
Loveded!
I echo the others. Really do consider joining a union if you are not already a member, and talk to your union if you are a member about how best to handle this. Give your CV out to employment agencies and remind yourself of your options to work for other companies who aren’t shit heads, hell maybe you’ll even get a better job out of it (one where not being photo ready 24/7 isn’t an offence). Good luck – you have my support!
If have a bit of a subversive streak in me, especially when it comes to arbitrary/ stupid rules and sometimes bridges get burned. However, as you are planning on leaving, once you find a new job or hand in your notice, you can start wearing the most outrageous make up, such as green mascara and bright purple eyeshadow, etc.
Ha! Totally go into work every single day in fancy dress. xo
I never wear makeup (as in I genuinely don’t even own any), and this sort of thing makes me so fucking angry. I once walked out of a job interview when the interviewer stated that five different types of makeup were mandatory, as if that was a perfectly normal, reasonable thing. There are not enough words to describe my rage at the idea that a natural human face is somehow “unprofessional” (or even unattractive). Just… AAAAARRRGH >.<
Good luck with the job search, anyway. You deserve better.
Why won’t you post my
Comment? Just because I don’t agree with you
This is one of the advantages of working in IT and doing an engineering program at graduate school… Everyone Every one expects you to look like shit anyway!
So true, people think you are having some kind of melt down if you dare to bare after they are used to you with makeup.
On the odd occasion in my current job I have come to work sans makeup and people are all “are you okay” “you look tired” “heavy night!!” which is annoying.
Years ago I worked in a restaurant and showed up on evening with a bare face, the general manager walked past me and with a look of horror asked ” you are going to put some makeup on right!”… gutted, as a fresh faced 20 year old it really cut, now 20 years on, I bite back.
Ha! It is quite ludicrous at the reaction of people to see women without make up – you would think that it was a requirement of being a female to never be seen without it! xo
WOW. That is appalling. I mean really, truly crap.
I have fond memories of telling my old MD that calling a female colleague’s heels “tart trotters” was 100% NOT ON. And that he couldn’t refer to the three women hired at the same time as “the coven”. Sheesh.
But I wanted to give a more positive story about my current workplace. I work in the head office of a FTSE 100 company. The CEO is down the hall, and my boss is an extremely high-powered executive. This is the poshest office I have ever worked in. And neither my boss nor her PA bothers with makeup on a day-to-day basis. I’m struggling to think of the last time I saw them wear any. No-one has ever commented. Ever.
So all power to women who don’t want to put up with this shit. Take the extra 5 minutes in bed!
Thank you! And thank you for sharing about your current work environment. That just proves make up isn’t a necessity to climb your way to an amazing position.
5 minutes in bed always!
The boss is wrong, and out of line. If she meant you don’t look smart enough generally then she should have said that: it’s reasonable to expect people to be presentable (eg appropriate & clean clothes & shoes).
Working 40 hours a week isn’t exactly slaving, though.
Another who genuinely doesn’t own any makeup.
It was indicated to me it was an expectation. I indicated I didn’t think my patients would give a damn if they were sick enough to be seeing me.
I still don’t own any makeup.
I would just get up early and follow a drag queen makeup tutorial on youtube before going in tomorrow.
This is ludacris, you are getting paided for your job. If it’s a requirement to look a certain way in that particular field you do it or you just work for someone else. You are just a straight complainer. Why don’t you become an entrepreneur and see how it is to run a business. Instead you sit on the sidelines and complain. Get a new job and move on. People like you will never get ahead in life you will always have an excuse and it will always be someone else’s fault.
I imagine your excellent spelling and talent for neologisms has gotten you all the way to the top, Ludacris
Dear Ken,
Of course she is paid to do her job which she can do if she wears make-up or not.
If it was a requirement to look a certain way it should be either laid down in a contract or as a part of a code of conduct. From her article I would say that neither is in place. As such the comment by her boss was inappropriate.
To illustrate: If you went to work wearing a hat every day, maybe because your hair is thinning and you are awfully aware of it. Then one day you decide not to do it anymore because you accepted that you are going to loose it all eventually. On this day your boss comes up to you and tells you, your thinning hair looks awful and you should as of now come in with a hat, always. Would you be offended?
LOL at the pompous mansplaining ‘entrepreneur’ who is so illiterate he thinks ‘paided’ is a word and that ‘ludicrous’ is spelled ‘ludacris’ like the rapper. Zero stars, would not employ.
Thank you Rachael! I have decided not to directly respond anymore to this individual who doesn’t believe I will never get ahead in life. ‘Paided’ – ha!
Ditching the slap was one of the most liberating things I have ever done.
Since even before my teens, I *never* left the house without a full face of slap (foundation, liner, mascara, blusher – at the very least). I was convinced that my naked face would upset innocent members of the public and that I would be, unmasked, an affront to all those who I encountered.
Then, my other half and I were due to go on holiday and he suggested that it might be nice not to have to worry about all that stuff in the heat. He is one of those ‘natural is better’ types.
On a whim, I took out my makeup bag and went off on holiday for 2 weeks without it. here’s the thing – nobody keeled over in shock. And I adjusted pretty quickly out there.
Then, when I came back, I decided to maintain this makeup free state of affairs. Which I did. And it’s brilliant. Nobody noticed the difference (or of they did, were sufficiently polite not to say so).
It is fantastic to now have 20 spare minutes in the morning to read the news, read this blog, have a third cup of coffee, or whatever. Spending 20 minutes each morning applying warpaint (in my case, in a quest to erase my many imperfections) was a total waste of my time in retrospect.
This, exactly. I was a terribly insecure teenager and was a slave to the slap, but when I was 17 or 18 I realised how sad it was that I’d hardly ever seen any of my female friends’ real faces and how we all felt too self-conscious to leave the house without it, while our male friends just didn’t have to deal with anything like that. I just stopped, went completely cold turkey, and… no one reacted at all. And it only took me a couple of days to adapt. Years later, no one even notices. In fact, people are surprised when I tell them. And no, I’m not some stunning goddess with permanently perfect skin or anything (though actually my skin has improved MASSIVELY now it gets to see the sun and isn’t smothered in foundation and powder). I wish more women would realise that it really isn’t as big a deal as they imagine.
I did the exact same thing with the same results. Makeup hasn’t touched my face in a decade and I’ve never felt a negative effect. Except for those people who, when they find out, say “oh, well you don’t need it.” I’m never sure what to make of this, but my stance is always firmly the same across the board: no one should ever feel they need to mask themselves. Taran, I like the idea of reversing the standard into full-blown clown with your boss, but I also think you should know there are many people behind you should you choose to stand up for yourself. Really, you have nothing to lose in the end. A shit boss will never change.
Please please please! Go to a cosmetic shop, buy the cheapest most mismatched foundation, mascara (poundshop) and pile that shit on! And then strut in to work like coco Chanel herself painted your face =)
I recently read an interviewer publish an account where he sat down with a young woman and made the decision not to hire her based on the fact that she wasn’t wearing enough makeup. Believe it or not, this was a position at a public library and, yes, the interviewer was a man. He complained that the woman had too much acne to work with the public without covering it with makeup. Can you guess how things would have gone differently if a man had been interviewing? This needs to stop. Thank you for speaking your voice.
Ken -
I know you are a wind-up merchant.
It is totes ‘ludacris’, that when ‘paided’ to do a job, these non-entrepenur-types behave as though they retain ownership of their own faces.
I mean, whatever next? Maybe these complainers (most likely wimmin, I fear) will start thinking they own their bodies too.
They will then start expecting equal pay.
This madness has to stop.
Ken, looks having nothing to do with skill set and as I have run a business and employed people I was more concerned that they turned up on time and not being a primary school teacher (at the time) trusted them to look presentable. If they were not then yes I would talk with them and suggest an alternative route, but I would never ask them to dress uncomfortably. By the way, I am a man who wears what he likes manages to wear trainers to work every day with long hair and I work in a primary school no one passes comment because I work incredibly hard because I love my job. Not strictly dress code, but I’m comfortable and no one, not once has mentioned my appearance. Of course I dress for the job, I wear a suit if needs be in my other roles, but then I’m the Deputy Mayor of my home town, have you tried wearing a mayoral chain with Dallas Cowboy’s away Jersey? Looks ridiculous.
Taran, thank you for a great article and I hope you find somewhere where your skill set is appreciated :).
To be fair, I can see (to an extent) where they’re coming from. I also work in beauty (though again, not makeup but fragrance) and because I don’t shave my legs, my manager requested that I not wear sheer tights to work and instead either shave or wear opaque tights. It may even be in your contract – mine certainly covers a lot of appearance-related requests at the manager’s discretion (even stipulating that they were allowed to decide I was wearing *too much* makeup and ask me to wear less). It’s by no means ideal, but much more understandable in your chosen field. Outside certain industries it would be completely unacceptable, but any company that has associations with beauty or luxury has a particular stake in making sure its representatives look presentable to a very high standard in order to uphold the ideals of the brand. In your case, the brand is founded on the notion that removing body hair is a mark of pride in your personal appearance, so obviously they want representatives that seem to embody that pride and effort in all areas of their public appearance. And it’s at least something you can remove along with your work clothes the moment you’re out of the building (unlike the occasions when black women have been asked to change their entire hairstyle on the grounds that braids/afros are ‘unprofessional’…or indeed the companies that request their male employees be clean-shaven, which I have seen enforced).
Really, it’s about balancing your very real obligation to represent your company in the way they want to be represented, and maintaining your own autonomy. I’m sure you’ll find a brand that gels much better with your personal ideals, but if it helps, I have found that noticeable lipstick, even with nothing else, can often give the illusion of a fully made-up face…
Though, as an addendum to my comment, these obligations clearly don’t apply if you’re just going about your business in the office. I’d assumed, because my work has some very client-facing marketing people, that your job involved a lot of representing the company at meetings (hence my use of the words ‘public’ and ‘representative’) – and in those situations, I don’t think your manager’s request is unreasonable. Asking you to wear make-up if you’re just having a day of emails is definitely crossing a line, though.
I’m not wishing to be contentious here, I have worked in the public sector with beauty products as a manager of my own business and I completely get where you are coming from as regards looking good for the job but I never expected anyone to wear make-up. They should have clean hair, respectable clothes and work hard, yes. But make-up? No.
One question – how do the men in your office sell the products? Do they have to wear the make-up too?
No, no, no! Surely this can’t be acceptable? I say dig deep and look to standing up to your boss. There must be some one you can speak to to seek advise in all of this. your boss is being completely unprofessional and most likely doesn’t have a leg to stand on! Don’t give in, fight back!
HAhahahahaha. Oh dear. I never wear makeup, and I work as an administrative assistant around a bunch of men in a high-pressure sales environment (in the US). And if one of them ever said word one to me about the state of my face, I would password protect the office printer and see how far they get with that. I. Do. My. Job. Hands down. Nobody can argue with that.
To add to that, I’m highly sensitive to most mainstream cosmetics. I get very bad skin reactions to most foundations, and I get this horrendous allergic cheilitis to a lot of lipsticks and glosses that looks absolutely awful. And don’t get me started on eyeliner, which has caused so many problems with my contact lenses I can’t even count anymore. So basically my employer, because it certainly would not be my choice to wear it in the first place, would need to shell out for more expensive non-irritant products. But luckily, I am not employed by idiots, so it’s never been an issue.
Good luck to you, Taran. You are in a ridiculous situation. I don’t know what UK employment law is, but an intelligent woman in this day and age should never be told she needs to wear makeup to do her job properly. There is being workplace-appropriate and professional in your manner and attire, and then there is this nonsense.
Some of the women at one of my former jobs used to say that if our bosses were going to insist on our wearing lipstick, we were going to insist on their having hair. We felt that they would be more presentable to the clientele not bald. Fair is fair. (PS I don’t actually care about a man’s hair sitch. We were merely proving a point.)
Go in to work looking like Lisbeth Salander when she went to court. Ha!
I’ve heard make-up can be damaging to your skin long-term, which makes it plain irresponsible to enforce it. It seems risky to post your name with this article before you have a new job, but it seems pretty clear your employer is not a reader of feminist writing. Good luck in your new job and I’m sure your face looks lovely whether it’s painted or not.
I am a newspaper reporter and have to be prepared to deal with very important people at a moment’s notice. I have to therefore dress smartly for work (none of my brightly coloured jeans) and my boss vetoed my getting the ends of my hair dyed pink. I do not wear makeup to work and nor do the two other female reporters, nor would my boss (male) ever dream of asking us to do so, I can confidently say it has never even crossed his mind. A woman does not need to wear makeup to be presentable any more than she needs to wear jewellery or straighten her hair, and it is not the same as asking someone to dress smartly. It is completely out of order.
I say grow your leg hair and show those babies off too! But seriously find a better job and boss if you can.
Alas, when it comes to makeup I suffer from a profound and terminal case of Not Caring. I’ve never been interested in makeup in general, although I will put on a small amount for special occasions. On a day-to-day basis wearing it makes me actively uncomfortable, as does anyone trying to give me a ‘makeover – BACK OFF OR I WILL HIT YOU. I know some people like to ‘put on their work face’ and that’s fine, but I’m the opposite. The more authentic I’m able to be, the happier I am and a more productive employee I become!
I don’t really see the point of it for everyday anyway. There’s nothing wrong with my face, it’s just a face. I’m pretty sure you can deal with it if you really try
Say what?! Actual what???? She CANNOT say this to you, she certainly cannot fire you. Some sort of union (do the beauty industry have those, i don’t know?) or tribunal needs to get involved here. This is beyond outrageous. I am outraged for you.
I am genuinely thankful I work in the NHS where you’re sort of half expected to look like shit and if you don’t its assumed it’s probably because you haven’t been working hard enough.
Thank you for your article. I found myself wearing more and more make-up whilst at uni and I genuinely think the daily routine of putting it on was damaging my self esteem little by little – its a way of reminding yourself every morning that, on your own, you are not good enough. So last year I stopped wearing it. I was apprehensive about what people would think, but nobody has ever mentioned it. Obviously I look better with make-up on. Sometimes I feel self-conscious without it but I don’t want to hide behind make up so I choose not to. Now I am working with children, they don’t wear make up and neither do I!
Your boss is out of line. Being clean and professional doesn’t require wearing make up. Men don’t need it and neither do women!
There is a difference between presentable and made-up! I find it “ludacris” that Ken here doesn’t know the difference. It is well within a manager’s right to ask you to adhere to a dress code, shower regularly and wear clean clothes. That make you presentable, and that makes you professional. Make-up in no way is tied to professionalism or hygiene, and it is crazy for anyone to say otherwise. If that’s the rule then men should have to slap on concealer every time they’re looking a bit tired… lets see how well that goes over
This literally just happened to me. I walked out. It was a shitty job but still. I was a busser… And today was the first day I came in with no makeup. My boss came up to me while I was on my break and said “what’s wrong with your face?” I then told him how I had acne and I can’t wear makeup everyday and sweat like I do, it just gets worse. Then he said “wear makeup. You’re going to scare off my costumers”. What. The. Fuck. I just cried and was in shock. I haven’t been this upset since high school. I have been bullied to the point where I almost commited suicide. And to come to somewhere I make my money to support me and my husband is horrible. I’m still in shock, and yes I’m still crying.